Too much of Althusser, Gramci.....

Again Back in the same place like before. Almost everyone around me is excited about their future. This is it. we meet, we never meet. I have never thought about the future I am too scared to think of it. Right now I just want to vandalize things. Though I cant do in a big way it would be fun if I could do that. Destroy this education system, this culture, our ethics, sexuality, nationhood.... where all there is to us is everything, now. imagine what the state would be like. For the present moment I want to vandalize myself. Refuse this state of consciousness, refuse this state of reason, refuse civilization, refuse instructions. A person, confined to the shells of solitary, cartoon on the papers in the dustbin, has suddenly been able to see the simmering light somewhere outside, is desperately finding a place to sit rest, talk. Lots of things going around feb 21, 22, 23...., documentary, housing policies,culture paper, msw, our readings, wish i could play a small part in vandalizing some of them.....